Such a strange, even surreal position to be in, but it’s one I’m used to…I guess. If I do a certain thing, then it might jeopardize another. But if I wait for a different thing, then what I was expecting, might not happen. If, however, I decide to go through with something different, then it might completely destroy my chances for something else. But if I don’t do anything, sit the situation out, then I might lose it all. It’s like a risky, high stakes game of poker: the odds are drastic, and the hand I play could mean the difference between a considerable variable of outcomes, some much worse than the others.

Do the gods sit upon their thrones of gold and look down upon this folly? Is there some enjoyment to be had, like a coliseum death game, where their is joy in watching those who face the dripping, hungry jaws of the adversary?…Is the afterlife any better?

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